This week we're continuing our discussion of Don Miguel Ruiz's landmark book The Four Agreements.
One of the Four Agreements is to be impeccable with your words. Ruiz says the human mind is like a fertile ground where seeds are continually being planted. By hooking our attention, a word can enter our mind and change a whole belief, for better or for worse.
Now, I had the kind of mother that all of my friends growing up called Mom.
Everyone, and I mean everyone, who's ever met my mama loved her.
She would never intentionally hurt anyone, especially not one of her boys.
But the power of the spoken word is immense. She had no idea what she was doing the day I chose one of my greatest insecurities in life. You see, my mama was only about five foot two inches tall, and for most of her adult life, she weighed over 200 pounds.
It was a personal demon that she was never able to slay. In fact, she blamed her weight most of all when her marriage to my dad fell apart and ended in divorce after 31 years.
Now, the closest thing to a curse word I ever heard that came out of her mouth was directed at herself. Yes, it was the f-word—fat.
My lifelong insecurity was born from a simple, innocent, loving remark that she would often make to me growing up: “Robbie, I'm sorry. Your skinny little brother looks like he's going to take after your daddy, but it looks like you're gonna take after me.”
I believed her. The seed took root in the fertile ground of my young mind, and I have struggled with my weight off and on for most of my life. No matter how many thousands of miles I ride on my bike this year, part of me will always see myself as that chubby kid getting bullied on the playground, and I'm a life coach. That’s how powerful words can be.
This week's challenge is to live the first agreement and be impeccable with your word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word against yourself or gossiping about others. Use the power of the word in the direction of Truth and Love. Good luck with the challenge!